fancy swine

i was sitting at the bar and there was a pirate chewing on his glass. he had a pig with a leash and it was wearing boots. i thought it would be a good idea to get the pig a skateboard with little clips that clip into the boots and then let him just roll around on the ship. or her. i can't tell. this pirate didn't look like the type who would put a bow on anything to differentiate.
i also the other day saw a windmill. it was a beautiful, sunny day and the birds were making noises and it was so relaxing and the windmill was covered in extremely offensive grafitti.